Thursday, July 31, 2008 say a million words...

i sure hope so because i don't have time to write so here are some pictures....
eating in the park...
the happy couple just as they got out of the temple
i got up at four that morning to do paige's hair
the bridal party
the bride's maids...

i'm putting together my classroom. teaching starts on monday! i just survived meet the teacher night off less than 15 hours of sleep over the past 4 nights.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

...what makes a man reach out and touch...

ULTRA CLUTCH [hairspray]! today i had the wonderful opportunity to practice doing paige's hair for her wedding. i have always wanted to go and get my cosmetology license and expand on a talent that i had been given. however, i have yet to accomplish that goal in my life. but for now i'm content with playing around and experimenting and having fun.

here are some pictures of paige's hair from tonight. now keep in mind that paige has three times as much hair as the average person. this took us about 2.5 hours to do. there are some things that need to be moved here and there but you get the gist of it.

in this instance i am grateful for hairspray, pomade, bobby pins, and creativity. i'm also grateful for a talent that i can use to help other people with. i don't take credit for the talent. it is a gift that my father in heaven has allowed me to use. everything i am and everything i will be is all because of Him.

i am also grateful that paige trusted me enough to do her hair. i'm hoping not to ruin her wedding day with ugly hair. we will begin the hair doing at 4 am! yes 4am. yahoo.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008 is a highway...

ok i'm back! i am taking a break from my frantic packing to blog again. i'm finally back for my last week in utah. just a small update before i express some gratitude. so i'm headed to arizona at the end of the week. yesterday i found out that i will be teaching kindergarten in two and a half weeks!!!! ah! i'll update you more as i learn more.

so today i'm grateful to just be alive. i am grateful for the wonderful opportunity of mortality. i think heavenly father knew what he was doing. i am grateful to know, in a what seems like a very basic sense, of who i am, why i am here, and where i am trying to get to.

while my mom and i were driving to az last week we encountered a stand still on the highway. about 10 cars ahead of us, a car going west bound blew a tire and lost control. it crossed the median and flipped repeated over the east bound lanes. we barely missed the accident being directly in front of us or possibly hitting us.

as you can see in the picture i got out and walked down the highway to see what was going on and to see if there was anything anyone could do. the emergency team responded so quickly. 4 helicopters landed on I-10 air lifting the victims out. the victims: 2 adults and 3 children. i watched as they were loaded in ambulances and the med helicopters.

i walked back to the car and told my mom about what had happened. i was overwhelm with gratitude that no one had died. amazingly enough no one going east bound was hit by the car that crossed over. i was grateful that my mom and i hadn't been 10 cars ahead and in dangers path.

i am grateful for my life and for the blessings that have come through life. i'm grateful for my body and the gifts my father in heaven, my earthly parents, other family, and my friends have shared me with and my own personal gifts that they have helped me cultivate. my life is filled with many things to be grateful for. without this life i would not be able to come to that knowledge. i would not know what i know now.

it kind of reminds me of what Wanda aka Wanderer observes about the human race in the book The Host. I won't ruin the book for those that haven't read it yet, but Wanda shares about how humans love and how they live their lives in such a way that is more vibrant than she has ever experienced. she talks of the colors, the emotions, the conundrums, dichotomies, and joys. i am grateful to say that I AM in the thick of all of it. I am grateful!

Wednesday, July 9, 2008


ok so i was going to be super ambitious this month and blog every day. but i don't think that is going to happen over the next couple of days. i mean i could blog quickly each day, but i think i'll wait and blog with real intent later and make up for the days.

i'm in arizona. this morning i left utah early, stopped in vegas, then ontario, and finally stopping in arizona. yes its true. i'm doing some more house hunting and district stuff.

i will be back to blogging soon. forgive the chaos. thanks!

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

...i'm not that girl... or popular...

i'm going to break away from the months theme for the day because i am elated about what i'm going to write about today. for the month of july i had planned to blog each day about something different i was grateful for. however today im deviating from that slightly. i will resume the gratitude journal again tomorrow from phoenix.

for those of you who know that production of wicked know where i got the title for this entry. it is titles of two of the songs in the musical. two of my favs.the exciting news is that today i bought tickets to see WICKED. finally. 8 of us, amy, quinn, andy, me, tracie, tawnie, rebecca, and katie, are going to see wicked in aug. thats it. i'm on cloud nine.

Monday, July 7, 2008 year older and wiser too?...

i really love birthdays. that love leads to gratitude believe it or not. i'm a huge fan of a day set aside to celebrate the birth of a child of god. there is yummy cake, balloons, ice creams, friends, family, and not to mention presents. kidding. well sorta.

birthdays are a great time for reflection. that, for me, is what i am most grateful for. its a day that is set apart to really take inventory of your life. its a great time to evaluate the past year of your life, set goals for the next year in your life, and change. yes yes, i know most people do that during the new year's season. but birthdays are so much more personal. i mean the day is all about you. its not like a mass amount of people are all making the same "resolutions."

birthdays are always a very intimate experiences for me, at least for the past 3 or 4 years, as i have gotten older. my focus has changed from the cake and presents, to really a celebration of just being alive. to me its the best time to assess whether or not you are showing your gratitude for that life by the way you have lived the past year and what you are doing to get where you want to go (which i hope is of eternal consequence). and if you are celebrate it. if you aren't humble yourself, repent, and turn to the direction you need to be and celebrate that recognition.

its also just an opportune time to see the changes over your life in all aspects. its great to see how you have grown and changed; physically, emotionally, spiritually.

i am grateful for a day that is just for me. and i am grateful for a day that is set aside for each person that i love. and i'm grateful for another excuse to show my love and appreciation for myself, other people, and our creator during that day.

i hope that each of you, myself included, find ourselves both a year older and wiser too!

p.s. happy birthday tomorrow paige! helping hands...

today i am really grateful for my roommates. they just spent the evening and night helping me pack up the load of "stuff" that i have accumulated throughout the five years i have been here in provo. so basically we packed up all my worldly possessions minus my furniture (my sleigh bed, 2 dressers, 2 bookcases, and a set of floating shelves), my clothes, and "immediate" needs.

don't worry the monotonous task was filled with laughter, grunts, and emotions as i finally threw away 3.5 years of my life (aka the ex-fiance). that task was filled with mixed emotions. but they were there to help me through it.

thanks for the memories. i'm going to miss you like crazy. thanks for being patient with me. thanks for the crazy night with the make up and pictures! thanks for the bob marley night and eating snacks in our basement. not to mention all the funny quotes and the mishaps of every day that keep like interesting!

joy i am especially grateful for your listening ear and your willingness to not judge me. thank you for your advice and guidance when i was trying to decide whether or not to serve a mission. shareka thanks for always coming with me and being my adventure buddy. thanks for all your encouragement at work and for staying late me with some days. also, thank you both for being there when i was down. thank you for offering bodily harm and for sticking up for me when someone decided to be mean to me. i love you both.

thanks shareka and joy for helping me get it all put away. you guys are the best! see you in morning with those muffins i promised to bake you!

oh and shareka do you mind.... just kidding! i'm still really sad that we didn't get a picture of you in your "maid/slave" get-up.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

...short and sweet...

today i am grateful for patience.

Romans 5:3

Friday, July 4, 2008

...god bless america...

i feel gratitude to live in such a time and in such a place. this entry will be short for now and modified later.

i am grateful to be an american citizen and to live at a choice time in the history of the world!

Happy 4th of July!

Thursday, July 3, 2008 two wholes that made me whole...

today i want to express my deep gratitude for my parents. my parents have taught me so much i don't even know where to begin. my dad has taught me how to manage money, be wise, calm, think it through, reasoning, logic, math, knowledge, patience, and so much more. my mom has taught me what it means to be creative, cook, clean, spend like a mad woman, decorate a room, be emotional, risk, and so much more.
both of my parents have taught me to be proud of who i am and the things that i do. they have each given me the best of who they are and i hope that i have taken those two pieces and made them proud with what i have done with them.
My mom and me at the Keukenhof in Holland

my dad has always been a silent foundation in my life. he silently guides and supports me. my mom has always been the verbal one. the one to loudly guide me and tell me what i should be doing. i don't always appreciate each of those completely different styles of parenting enough.
My Daddy and Me in Omaha

just the other day i broke down under the weight and pressure of having to move so quickly and taking on a not so ideal situation of employment and such. my dad was right there helping me through it. he just listened to me sob as i sat in the middle of the boxes and stuff that had to be put away in boxes. he offered a solution to the mass chaos and i appreciate it.
My birthday lunch at Claim Jumper

that same day my mom encouraged me to take a leap of faith and to do something that i have never done before. she expressed confidence in me and my ability to make a decision. that has been a rare occurrence, but for one that i am most grateful.
Daddy and Me sledding at Christmas!

dad. thank you again for your humor and your silliness. i don't think many people know that about you. thank you for teaching me to be self disciplined and to know when to walk away. thank you for teaching me how to conquer the battles that are deep within my soul on my own. thank you for teaching me to work hard and to take pride in my work. thank you for stretching me and pulling me to my potential. thank you for teaching me when to talk and when to hold my tongue (still working on that one (= ) thank you for teaching to me how to win without putting someone else down.

mom. thank you for teaching me how to be who you want to be without being ashamed of it. thank you for teaching me how to love other people. thank you for teaching me how to serve. mom, thank you for teaching me not to be afraid to say something when other people aren't speaking up. thank you for teaching me how to match and have an "eye" for certain things. thank you for fostering my "sense of fashion". thank you for letting me know that i am a "great catch." thank you for being a fighter. thank you for teaching me what it means to live with passion.

mom and dad i love you! and i hope that you are proud of me. thank you for loving and supporting me even when i didn't always make the best decision. thank you for my name and for the strength that i draw from it. thank you for seeking for the truth in your late teens and then sharing it with me. i am grateful to call you my parents.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

...adversity has never been this...

...beautiful? fun? haha. i'm not sure. but i'm grateful for the hell fire i feel like i have been through for the past month or so. my life has been turned up side down, inside out, and at times has seemed to come to a complete stop.

however, at the end of the day i can go to my knees and thank my heavenly father for the things that i have learned along the way about others, relationships, myself, and life.

the past couple of months have been anything but a cake walk. i was doing what i thought i could about securing a place for myself outside of utah and away from certain stumbling blocks. i was applying to different jobs, emailing employers, finishing up my first year of teaching, figuring out whether or not to fight for someone or to bow out gracefully and walkaway. i felt like for a long time that i wasn't getting anywhere.

the night i got back from seattle i was texting amy and realized that for first time in a while i was happy. genuinely happy. and i was ready to keep going; to move forward. and of course i spoke all too quickly. the next morning i was hit with an "atom bomb." details are not needed. i just felt like my life came to a screeching halt. i felt betrayal, used, deceived, disrespected, and shell shock.

when the shock wore off i finally snapped back into it all i broke down and figuratively threw my hands in the air with defeat. in my head i replayed everything i had done to try to move forward and pleaded with God to have one thing work out. i just had this feeling that i had been forgotten.

...then of course i was proven wrong. my phone rang and it was the head of HR in arizona saying that they wanted me to come and work for them. i was so excited and just so extremely grateful. my savior and heavenly father hadn't forgotten me. there was somewhere for me and there was something for me to do. the phone call couldn't have come at a better time.

so i am grateful for the "crud" i went through so that i could have that sweet moment of joy and happiness.

...thank my lucky stars...

for the month of july i plan on blogging about the things that i am grateful for. i was sitting around the other day reading shareka's blog about "a picture a day..." and i thought to help to change my heart that i would blog each day about something or someone that i am grateful for.

since today is the first day of july (technically the second of july)i thought that i would do a quick introduction to this months topic and state a small disclaimer before i begin.

i am moving this month to arizona. in the craziness of the month i'm hoping to blog each and everyday. i am being pretty optimistic with this goal. I'll be flying back and forth to phoenix at least three times and from phoenix to sacramento at the end of the month for paige and jason's wedding before beginning whatever grade on august 4th. so if i miss a day in all the chaos please don't judge me.

tomorrow will be the first official day of the month of gratitude!