Fortune Cookies... truth or hoax?

Yesterday was an eventful day. I woke up bright and early at 10:52 am. Yup that's right. I don't know how it happened, but it did. I had made plans to make breakfast for the roommates. I even went to Smith's the night before to grab all the goodies. Needless to say I ended up making lunch instead.

I made French Toast, eggs, and bacon. Nothing extremely fancy, but it hit the spot.

After our delicious meal,Joy discovered a beautiful sight outside of our backyard; which, by the way, is a 10 by 10 concrete slab enclosed by a white vinyl fence. ha. You know you live in a beautiful place when you look out the window and spot a whole family of deer, or what Mir called a pack or something like that. The tiny little herd had 7 deer in it. They were just strolling through the field/open lot behind our house. They stopped occasionally to stare at us. I mean we were staring at them too, not to mention snapping pictures. It was a tranquil moment.

Shareka and I cheered on our friends in their intramural basketball game. Quinn, Andy, and Justin all played well. You guys should be proud. We had fun cheering from the bleachers. I had never sat up there before. And a note to self, don't sit in the front row, you're too short to see over the railing. Unfortunately they were not triumphant during this feat, but hey there is always the next game.

After the game I met Andy's Mom, Dad and Aunt. They were just as entertaining. "Andy, 0-5 on free throws, come on now" Andy's Dad. Even Andy's aunt had some advice for the boys for their next game. Two words from me: Rebound and Defense.
After, Shareka and I headed to the Sundance Film Festival in Salt Lake City. Shareka had been wanting to see this moving for the past few weeks. This was the last night that it would be showing. I've never been before and it sounded exciting so we jumped in the car and headed north. The whole experience was fun. It was good to just talk about life and catch up during the drive there.

We met up with a few friends at the theater, waited line for a waiting list ticket and headed to one of my favorite restaurants, PF Changs. Yummy food. I think i had a little too much to eat and it caught up with me later. OOOOooooOOO but I did have my favorite drink. Its a childhood favorite: a Shirley Temple. I used to drink them all the time in my grandparent's chinese restaurant when I was little. It was my favorite thing to do while visiting the establishment. That and playing Pong and Pack man. Anywho, back to the weekend...

Here is where the title of my entry comes into play. After dinner our waiter Remington brought the customary fortune cookies to the table. Everyone grabbed a fortune cookie and opened it up. Most played the whole "in bed" game with their fortunes. I picked up the last fortune cookie, broke it open and ate the cookie part first. Its this weird thing that I do. I have to eat the cookie first before reading the paper otherwise the fortune won't be for you. I don't know where I got that notion from, but I just do. Its not that I believe in the fortunes, but I think they at least give me food for thought. Yes I am even one of those people who keep the fortunes they like and put them in their wallet as a keepsake. Lame I know, but that's me! (its in my scriptures...yes... in my scriptures...)

So what did they say. Shareka's mentioned that money and travel would be in her future. How true! She gets paid on Thursday and she's going on a trip this weekend with her best friend Megan!

Mine? "Your life's foundation is becoming quite strong." At first I thought it was really lame. How non exciting. I kind of disregarded it at first. I didn't even share it with the table because it wasn't as interesting as everyone else's. Why was I so ashamed? Ha. I don't know. Anywho... as the night progressed I began to reflect more and more about what the little slip of paper said. My life hasn't been all roses and sunshine lately. I really have been doing a lot of "soul searching." I have had a few life changing questions weighing on my mind and on my heart. Those that are close to me know what I mean when I say that. Let me go on to a side story that has to do with the fortune cookie...I hope to not offend anyone with what I say next.

The following story is a reflection of my own realization of who I am and is not a reflection about how I feel about others and their choices.

While sitting in the theater I had no idea what to expect. I was super excited as the director told us a little about the film before it began. The house lights when down and the movie started. I had never been to see an independent film before. I didn't realize that the standards and ratings didn't exist for them. Little did I know that I was about to be exposed to the f-word more than 10 times and listen to sexual joke after sexual joke, most of which went over my head.

The first bomb that dropped went some what unnoticed. I thought, well it'll only be once. Good thing its outta the way, I can just enjoy the movie. I have always thought that I had a high tolerance for profanity. (I'm not really sure that is even anything to be proud of) After all, I did attend high school in California. I was kind of just used to tuning it out. But as the movie progressed my spirit became more offended. I had to move in my seat every time I heard it or see something suggestive. To be completely honest I think that it is the nastiest, dirtiest, most degrading word in the English language. It is also the most unnecessary word to even have in existence.

I had to leave. I just had to leave. So after struggling with everything that might be said and might happen, I did. I just left. Did I leave when I should have? NO. I feel like I should have gotten up the first time I felt impressed to. I didn't. But I eventually found the strength to get out of my seat and leave. For ME and ME only this was the right thing to do.

Previous to this experience I had made, like most of you, new year's resolutions. One of these was not to view or listen to anything that would offend the spirit. This was brought on by a self assessment of the things that I once thought to be humorous or entertaining. When I was pondering of things to resolve or make resolute a scripture came into my mind. This scripture was introduced to me by a dear and close friend of mine. He is someone that I am most grateful for. He has been in instrument in the Lord's hand in showing me certain principles of the gospel. BunBun, thank you. The scripture reads, "When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. (1 Cor. 13:11). I knew that I needed to be resolute in what media I chose to bring into my life.

Julie B. Beck, in our church's General Conference gave an address called "Mothers Who Know." Her words have burned in my heart since they were given last year. I want to be a Mother who knows. She says, "Mothers who know do less. They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home." This too influence my personal standard on media in my life.

This is a very personal and sensitive subject for me to write about. Lately, I have often felt that I don't really fit in anywhere because of things like this. My mom always teases me about being "too serious" and acting like I'm 40 when I'm only 22. In fact, she's not the only one who thinks that about me. However, I just feel like this is where I am. This is who I am supposed to be. This is the level of accountability I have to my God. And I know that it isn't the same for everyone in the world. God is no respecter of persons. I'm not writing this to get kudos or the praise of man. I also realize that this is not a situation or experience that applies to everyone. I just had one of those sweet, tender mercies of the Lord that Elder David A. Bednar spoke of.

I was afraid of what others might say or think about me. I was afraid of hurting feeling or having someone feel like I had past judgment on them or turned up my nose. I was so afraid of what to do next that I called another friend of mine and he offered words of wisdom and comfort. Another blessing was a few encouraging text messages of love not to long after that. Thankfully, I had a great support system that didn't judge me and didn't feel judged. I am most grateful.

Which leads me back to the fortune cookie. "Your life's foundation is becoming quite strong." I feel very optimistic about this fortune, however "hokie pokie" that may seem. To me at that moment, when I got up and left the movie my foundation became that much stronger. I felt as though I had added to my foundation of life. I had proved it to myself and I guess confirmed to the Lord (since he knows all) where I stand in this area of my life. That fortune was meant for me. It applies to me. I was filled with a sense that the past trails in my life and the ones to come this year are going to help me build a foundation in the kingdom of God. I do not want my testimony to be like that of the Great and Spacious building, floating high in the air (1 Nephi 8:16). I want to have a foundation that is "steadfast and immovable always abounding good works" (Mosiah 5:15). I want to stand in holy places (Doctrine and Covenants 45:32).

This experience, along with a handful of others, has been a witness to me that Heavenly Father has a plan for me. I now have a motivation to build a firmer foundation in the principles of the gospel. Who would have thought, a fortune cookie! This path is not going to be easy. I don't expect it to be. Life was not meant to be easy. However, I have a changed perspective on the refiner's fire. I may mess up, I may stumble, I may eat every word that I just wrote in a moment of weakness. However, the blessings of the atonement are there to help me and anyone who seeks to make changes in their life...this change is made possible through the atonement of Jesus Christ, the savior of the world, my personal savior.